Realization ...

I had an epiphany the other day when thinking of how frustrating it is for me when Jake's 9-year-old attitude is snobby and hurts my feelings.  I get so hurt when he acts like he doesn't want to be with Nick, Ali, Adrienne, & I  ......

I thought of how Jake's attitude is so much like my own has sometimes been in terms of following God's will in my life.  I began thinking about how God must feel, having His own daughter not follow Him or do what He asks.  

It's strangely parallel to what I am experiencing with Jake.  And I'm not saying that I am flat-out meaning to defy God.  But perhaps I don't listen to His whispers to my heart as well as I could (or should).  

I thought of this again this morning as I was asking Jake to help me get things ready for church this morning and I asked him to get something off of a shelf.  He didn't listen to the details, he just opened the closet and started looking around, rummaging through things, making my closet a mess.  

How many times has God spoken to me but I've been too busy to listen to the details?  

How often have I "rummaged" through whatever it was He asked me to do and made a complete mess of it rather than listen to His guidance and followed it precisely?

Maybe I'm beginning to hear Him more or I'm learning how to listen better because I am definitely seeing myself through Jake's actions.  Perhaps I'm ungrateful for what God has given me.  (Nick & I often comment on how Jake seems ungrateful for many things and always expects people to do things or give him things.  And, while he is getting better, he is still quite often very ungrateful seeming.)  

Now I just need to keep listening to see what He wants me to do next.....

Reading

Ali has been reading books back to me lately after I read them to her.

A few nights ago we read the Mr. Mischief book. The way she said "Mr. Mischief" was so cute! She cracks me up!

She also amazes me with how well she tells back a story. She really listens and re-tells almost every detail.

I am so proud of her. 

In these pictures, she's reading to her baby sister, Adrienne.  She's such a good big sister! 

Sometimes I am worried (well, not sometimes, really. Actually it is almost always!) that I am not doing everything I can to activate and engage her brain. I constantly worry that I'm missing or forgetting something. But, in moments like these, she calms my heart and reminds me that I can't be a perfect mommy, but I am doing a pretty good job so far.

Ali has taught me so many things in her mere 2 1/2 years of life: patience, unrelenting all-consuming love, and faithfulness in God.

I can't imagine what more she'll teach me in the future, but I know she is a blessing straight from God, right into my arms & heart. <3